Tis a Sad Day. But, There is Hope

For the first time ever I seriously contemplated ending a workout early and doing less than required. I'm not obsessive about XC, but I always finish even if I need a little friendly persuasion from Goldielocks. After running that "Butt Hill" 6 times I was done. Tired. Out. But, I needed to do 8. Usually when I hit that point I say and maybe believe I don't want to do another but I always do. Today, I even walked part of my rest time. Yes, I did get 8 but ack, I sure didn't hit my times. That left a bad feeling, like after eating something foul and no matter how hard you try to wash it away the taste still lingers. I plan to make this up in the next workout. No, I will make this up.
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Anyway, school sucks as usual. Currentally I'm ignoring my test corrections for the test I just got a 78 on. Other than that I have no homework seeing as Barr wasn't here today. Drivers ed sucks as everyone from previous years have told me. Geometry is, well, geometry for those of you in my class. What am I forgetting? Oh, yeah. Art. I just found out, I'm not a visual artist. I may be a muscian but that, in no respect translates to drawing and painting and such.
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Next week the highs are supposed to drop to the 60's. Thats my kidna weather. This is my season as well. Apple cider, XC, Musical, colorful leaves, Halloween, snow, the Solstice, and the most amazing skys ever.

Ah, the sky.

I could go on and on about a winter, and the sky. When everything has a white/gray hue and everything seems to tingle with energy yet it's still. Walking through a forest, sheets of snow crash to the ground, branchs snap and everything is alive. And the cold, yes the cold. It makes me feel alive. Every part of my body tingles in the morning air, all of my senses are heightened and I feel mortal, I feel....everything. For the first time in almost a year I woke up shaking in my blankets. That must be one of the most amazing sensations.

After I'm out of the shower in the morning I choose clothing that barely covers me let alone warms me. I'm usually scolded for this by people who don't understand. I'm threatened even to start wearing long pants and a sweatshirt. But I need to feel that nip in the air. I need to feel alive again.


~Sigh~ It's almost here


~Entreri